filth.

Last night was probably the biggest mistake iv made in so long. Every single part of it makes me want to kill you. Part of me doesn't believe that you didn't plan it. You did, however, give up the lies and confirmed my suspicions. I can safely say that i'm more back to hating you than i am to liking you. I'm glad you weren't in my house still when i got up.. because it would not have ended nicely.

I really hurt Dawkins. And i really hurt Sam. Two of my 4 male best friends. The two guys that care more about me than most of the people i know. The two guys that look after me, and watch my back, and constantly have put up with my shit.
I don't know how many times iv said sorry.. but i'll keep saying it. Because theres nothing i can do to take it back. And theres nothing i can do to make this any better. But i'm doing my best.


I thought i knew myself better than this.
Apparently, i was wrong.